Character
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Quotes
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A Doogan walking to and fro behind the gallows. Tattle: "That's a lazy Doogan. He hunts shady 'jobs' that he expects to pay well. I bet he's never done an honest day's work in his life. What a piece of work."
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- "Professor Frankly? Actually, I think a guy by that name lives over on the east side... Just go east from here. As you enter town from the harbor, just hang a right. So, uh, what about him? Did this guy steal something important from you, or what?"
- "Hey, you don't have any good jobs, do you? You know, easy work, great pay? Or, at least, something easy? I don't do any heavy lifting. And I gotta get paid cash."
- "Hey, you don't have any good jobs, do you? You know, easy work, incredible pay? Yeah! If you've got easy work that pays a lot, I'm your man! I'm all OVER that!"
- "Hey, you don't have any good jobs, do you? You know, easy work, insane pay? Yeah! Easy work that surrounds a guy with lovely women, I'm your man!"
- "Hey, you don't have any good jobs, do you? You know, easy work, absurd pay? Yeah! Like, maybe something where I sing one song and collect royalties forever?"
- "Hey, you don't have any good jobs, do you? You know, easy work, amazing pay? Yeah! Like, maybe something where I do a little dance and get paid for life?"
- "Hey, you don't have any good jobs, do you? You know, easy work, unbelievable pay? Huh? Did you say lottery? No, no... No lottery for me. I lose WAY too much."
- "Hey, you don't have any good jobs, do you? You know, easy work, mind-blowing pay? It would be great if I could get paid a lot to sleep. Yeah, that's the job for me."
- "Hey, you don't have any good jobs, do you? You know, easy work, ridiculous pay? ...... Yeah, yeah! I got it, mister... Nobody pays anyone a lot to do something easy... Fine! I'll try working hard. I'll break a sweat...but I'd better get paid good for it!"
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A Goomba to the east of the gallows. Tattle: "That guy's a local Goomba. He'll give you advice and stuff, so he's OK. His tips totally might come in handy, so you oughta talk to him as often as possible."
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- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? If you press , you can check your current HP. I can't believe you didn't know that. If you have low HP, you oughta go rest in an inn so you recover. Use your head."
- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? If you gotta replenish both HP and FP, inns are better than recovery blocks. Inns will refill all your Star Power, too, that's why... Recovery blocks won't, genius."
- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? In this town...the boss of the Robbos and Don Pianta are in a nasty turf war. If you wanna live long, you'd better either choose a side, or stay the heck out of it."
- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? Some people are so good at fighting, they fight with Stylish moves, you hear me? I'm pretty sure that guy who lives underground will tell you about Stylish moves... If you're interested, go talk to that guy, 'cause I'm all tapped out."
- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? Here in Rogueport...there's a world-famous archaeologist... Huh? You already knew that? Fine, smart guy. I'll have a better tip next time."
- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? There's a world-famous sailor named Bobbery here in Rogueport who... Huh? He's already with you? Fine, Mr. Big Brain. I'll have a better tip next time."
- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? There are secret blue pipes below us that are connected to other parts of the world. If you find them, you'll be able to go to distant places like Poshley Heights instantly!"
- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? There are ruins beneath us, and you can go down there and find these pipes that... Huh? You already knew that? Fine, Mr. Brilliant. I'll have a better tip next time."
- "You look like you don't know nothing, so I'll teach you something, how 'bout that? There's this guy named Mario who saved the whole world in its darkest hour... Huh? YOU'RE Mario?!? W-W-W-Wait a sec'! Whoa! The rumors were all true?"
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A Doogan in the backside of the plaza. Tattle: "That's a suspicious Doogan. He craves that one big score, but I doubt it'll happen. I mean, even if he did make some money, he'd just blow it. He depresses me..."
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- "Dang, yesterday I blew through 100 coins at the parlor. You believe that? But not next time, man! I'm coming back a winner! The odds favor me now!"
- "Shoot, yesterday I blew through 200 coins at the parlor. You believe that? But next time..."
- "Man, yesterday I blew through 300 coins at the parlor. You believe that? But next time I'm gonna win. Just mark my words, man! I've got a system now!"
- "Yesterday I blew through 400 coins at the parlor...but next time, it'll all be good!"
- "Yesterday I blew through 500 coins at the parlor...but not next time! No way, man!"
- "Yesterday I blew through 600 coins at the parlor...but next time, I'm gonna... Oh, wait. Now I'm all outta cash. That isn't good."
- "Yesterday I blew through 700 coins at the parlor...but next time, I'll do better... I'm gonna hawk my expensive wristwatch and play some more! Brilliant move, eh?"
- "Yesterday I blew through 800 coins at the parlor...but next time, I'm definitely winning... Actually, you know what? Maybe I'll just quit..."
- "Hey, listen to this, man! Yesterday at the parlor... I won 100,000 coins! Yeah! Finally! I finally won! The dark skies all cleared up, I finally won... Great days are here at last! Hooray!"
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A Bandit in the leftmost house in the backside of the plaza. He is initially in the east part of Rogueport, dashing towards Mario and stealing half of his coins. Tattle: "That's a bandit who's made this place his hideout. Seems like he totally loves this place...but would it kill him to clean up a bit?"
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- "Eeeeeeeeeeeooops! Uh... Fancy meeting you here! You're pretty dang persistent, buddy! What a pain! Fine! FINE, OK? You got me. I'll give you your coins back. Here."
- "Huzzat?!? Hey! Aren't you that doofus who klutzed into me? You really owe it to yourself to carry a little cash around, buddy. Treat yourself right. I mean, I went to the trouble of trying to pick your pocket, but I didn't get a single coin!"
- "Lemme give you a news flash: even the innocent-looking people in town are thieves! So, don't come grumbling to me about losing a little pocket change, OK, buddy?"
- "Lemme give you a news flash: even the innocent-looking people in town are robbers! So, don't come crying to me about losing a little pocket change, OK, buddy?"
- "You got some kinda problem? You think you can just barge into my hideout, buddy? ...You're probably just jealous. No one snooping around... It's the perfect hideout spot!"
- "You got some kinda problem? You think you can just barge into my hideout, buddy? ...You're probably just jealous. No one snooping around... It's the perfect hideout spot! With all this garbage, there are tons of flies and stuff... Who'd want to come in here?"
- "You got some kinda problem? You think you can just barge into my hideout, buddy? ...You're probably just jealous. No one snooping around... It's the perfect hideout spot! This garbage attracts flies and huge roaches like crazy. Who'd want to come in here?"
- "You got some kinda problem? You think you can just barge into my hideout, buddy? ...You're probably just jealous. No one snooping around... It's the perfect hideout spot! Since there's garbage all over, the place just REEKS! Who'd want to come in here?"
- "You got some kinda problem? You think you can just barge into my hideout, buddy? ...You're probably just jealous. No one snooping around... It's the perfect hideout spot! I mean, look at this garbage! The place is a total mess! Who'd want to come in here?"
- "You got some kinda problem? You think you can just barge into my hideout, buddy? ...You're probably just jealous. No one snooping around... It's the perfect hideout spot! No windows... No breeze... It's all muggy and nasty! Who'd want to come in here?"
- "You got some kinda problem? You think you can just barge into my hideout, buddy? ...You're probably just jealous. No one snooping around... It's the perfect hideout spot! There's no natural light, so it's all dark and scary! Who'd want to come in here?"
- "You got some kinda problem? You think you can just barge into my hideout, buddy? ...You're probably just jealous. No one snooping around... It's the perfect hideout spot! Garbage... Flies... Roaches... Stinky... Dirty... Muggy... And there's no sunlight! Ohhhhhh! No WONDER! That's why nobody comes here! This place is gross! Ah, well. I can get used to living just about anywhere... I guess... Bleah."
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A Squeek in Podley's Place. Tattle: "That guy practically lives here... He must like it, huh? He's like, the ultimate regular. As far as I can tell, he's recounting the tales of every love of his life, one by one."
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- "... ... Can't you take a hint, pal? '...' means SCRAM! Don't talk to me!"
- "... ... '...' means SCRAM! Don't talk to me! My heart's burning for my long-lost love. Oh, Ms. Mowz, you sly, sultry, little thief... I hope you're doing well, wherever you are."
- "... ... '...' means SCRAM! Don't talk to me! My heart's burning for my long-lost love. Oh... Where has my beloved actress gone? Why did she forsake me? Yes, Flurrie was her name... She was skinny and toned, with a voice like an angel... But she left the bright lights behind and went off to live in peace and quiet..."
- "... ... '...' means SCRAM! Don't talk to me! My heart's burning for my long-lost love. Yes, the reception Boo at the parlor in the west part of town... How is she, I wonder? I'll never forget those eyes... and the passionate secrets that they hold."
- "... ... '...' means SCRAM! Don't talk to me! My heart's burning for my long-lost love. Yes, I'm speaking of the extraordinary beauty at the juice shop in Glitzville... No matter how many times I flirted, she never paid me the slightest attention..."
- "... ... '...' means SCRAM! Don't talk to me! My heart's burning for my long-lost love. I don't want to say this too loudly, you understand... But this blossom is the daughter of Don Pianta. Francesca, the temptress... I haven't seen her around town lately. I hope she hasn't eloped with another..."
- "... ... '...' means SCRAM! Don't talk to me! My heart's burning for my long-lost love. I've only ridden the Excess Express once in my entire life, you understand... But I met an angelic waitress in the dining car and gave her a present. I wonder if she's treasuring that gift, the earring I gave her out of purest love..."
- "... ... '...' means SCRAM! Don't talk to me! My heart's burning for my long-lost love. I've been to Poshley Heights only once in my entire life, you understand... But when I was there, I gave a gift to a gorgeous madame who lingered outdoors. I wonder if she treasures that gift, the silver ring I gave her out of purest love..."[note 1]
- "... ... I don't think I'll ever love again... As long as the world is at peace, I'll be happy... I think... Uh..."
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A Bob-omb sailor in Podley's Place. Tattle: "That guy's a Bob-omb sailor. I think he comes here every time his ship makes port. I don't blame him. This place has totally cool atmosphere. I'd be a regular, too..."
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- "Oy. I used to sail around and run wild in me younger days, but I'm a reformed sailor now. I used to go 'round explodin' all over the place without givin' it much thought."
- "Oy. I used to sail around and run wild in me younger days, but I'm a reformed sailor now. I was blowin' up north, south, east, and west back then. I was a real nutter!"
- "Oy. I used to sail around and run wild in me younger days, but I'm a reformed sailor now. I used to blow up all the time without payin' any heed to wot ordinary blokes thought."
- "Oy. I used to sail around and run wild in me younger days, but I'm a reformed sailor now. But then I got to thinkin'... Is blowin' up a part of the national Bob-omb identity? Naw, I figured... There must be lots o' blokes bein' all Bob-omb-ish wifout blowin' up! It was after I realized that that I quit blowin' up all the time. It was an eye-opener!"
- "Fer a Bob-omb, blowin' up is like throwin' a punch fer an ordinary bloke... If you wanna leave the biggest impression, you gotta do it wif perfect timin'. Me mum said that once you learn that timin', yer finally an adult Bob-omb. Ah, Mum."
- "Once I learned proper timin' for explodin', I started thinkin' it was an art form! But now I know: an explosion's just an explosion, and there ain't no way around it..."
- "When I was a lad and blowin' up all the time, some mates I respected once told me... 'Explodin' without thinkin' is like drinkin' coffee wifout any cream. It's just wrong.'"
- "I sense a shadow fallin' across this town, mate... Now may be time fer me to release all my pent-up explosions, I'm thinkin'..."
- "The moment that might 'ave needed my explosions seems to 'ave passed, eh? When that sky filled up with darkness, I was so shook I almost exploded on the spot!"
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